Sumbisori

Paris, just a few days before Christmas.

A monumental amount of snow had blanketed the whole of Paris in white. The sleet that began to flutter down early in the morning had turned into large, heavy flakes by mid-morning. After noon, the snow had piled up so deep that feet sank in with every step.

This much heavy snow was a rare sight in Paris.

The most excited, of course, were the children. It seemed as if the 19th arrondissement was full of them — they had taken over every alley and street corner.

Snow had also accumulated on the sedan where Liu waited for Yeehyeon in front of The Hands. However, there was no need to brush it off. As soon as the snow reached a certain thickness, small figures approached and swept it off the hood and trunk.

That snow became ammunition for snowball fights, or the very first snowball to roll for a snowman. Sometimes, it turned into white powder sprinkled on a friend's head.

Thanks to children of various ages playing in diverse ways, the wait for Yeehyeon's appearance wasn't tedious. This, too, felt like a scene composed for a movie.

For Liu, watching the world from the driver's seat while waiting for Yeehyeon was like being in a drive-in theater. He sipped his warm coffee periodically and chuckled.

The much younger children, not yet old enough to play alone, were accompanied by guardians. Even a little one barely more than a toddler taking first wobbly steps was fully bundled up and out on the street.

A tiny hand, impossibly small and wearing a mitten, touched the snow on the ground. The little body, crouched awkwardly, looked unsteady, as if it couldn't quite balance on its own yet. The child's guardian hovered nearby, anxious about when the toddler might tumble forward.

Liu, resting his elbow on the window ledge as he looked out, felt a warm smile spread across his lips.

It was the kind of smile that substituted the scene before him for his own happiness — a sweet, imaginative indulgence.

With Christmas approaching, the world suddenly seemed overflowing with generous hope and joy, as if a miracle had occurred — all because it had snowed.

Knock, knock, knock.

The unexpected sound of knocking startled Liu. As he lifted his tumbler to take a sip of coffee, he turned toward the driver's side window with a puzzled expression.

A little girl was standing there. She looked about six years old, her face just barely visible above the window frame.

Liu rolled down the window.

"Hello?"

"Hello."

In response to Liu's greeting, the girl raised her small, knitted-glove-clad hand in return.

"What is it? Can I help you with something?"

"I have a question."

"Uh… sure."

The child stepped closer to the window, lowering her voice.

"Mister, you're a detective, aren't you?"

"Huh?"

"You're always watching from inside this car. You're a detective, right?"

"Ah…."

The child's gaze, filled with certainty and expectation, was impossible to betray. Those eyes would clearly fall into disappointment if he said he wasn't a detective.

Liu carefully placed the tumbler he was holding back into the cup holder. Then, putting on an act of looking around cautiously and secretively, he beckoned the child to come closer. Just like she had done, he lowered his voice and whispered.

"How did you know I was in the car?"

"I saw you get out of the car a few times. I thought the car was empty, so I was surprised when you got out."

"Hmm…. I see."

Liu nodded and then pressed an index finger to his lips and said solemnly,

"But the fact that I'm a detective is a secret."

"I know! Because the criminal can't find out!"

The child looked up at Liu, eyes wide and shining behind their large brown irises, hands balled into tight fists inside their gloves. While the detective wasn't necessarily chasing a criminal, that was likely a trivial detail to the child.

"You know a lot about detectives."

"Because I've read several Sherlock Holmes books."

She looked bright, but Sherlock Holmes? Liu thought a six-year-old reading that might be tackling quite a heavy load. He widened his eyes in apparent amazement and asked,

"You can read Sherlock Holmes?"

The child let out a soft puff of air through her small lips, answering as if he were dense for not knowing.

"The Sherlock Holmes for kids. I'm a kid now, so I can't read the adult ones."

"Ah, right. That makes sense."

He almost let out a laugh at the child's earnest expression but managed to hold it in.

"But when I get older, I'm going to read the real Sherlock Holmes, too."

"I bet you will. I think you'll be able to read it soon enough."

The child broke into a wide, happy smile. It was a smile Liu couldn't help but return.

"So, can you keep this a secret between detectives?"

He could tell that the phrase "a secret between detectives" had completely captivated the child. A fierce tremor ran through the large, guileless eyes framed by dark pupils.

"I'll keep it a secret from Louise, from Allan, and from Mom and Dad, too."

"Amazing. You sound very trustworthy."

While playing along with the child's serious tone, Liu was swept up in a feeling entirely new to him.

Until now, he had never had the chance to be close to a child, and if anything, he had always found them difficult and fussy. Even though he loved Yeehyeon enough to lose his mind, he had only focused on keeping him close, never once imagining having a child with him.

But for the first time, he vaguely pictured having a child with Yeehyeon. Then he scoffed at himself with a crooked smile.

Imagining children when he'd been kicked out and placed under a restraining order. What an unrealistic fantasy.

"It's a shame to keep secrets from your best friend, but Louise or Allan might accidentally tell someone else. Right?"

"Allan won't tell."

"Oh?"

"I tell Allan everything, but Allan never tells anyone anything."

"Really?"

"Because he's a dog."

"Ah…."

Liu nodded, gazing into space with narrowed eyes, as if he had just reached a profound realization.

After promising to keep the secret even from the dog Allan, the child rejoined her friends, leaving behind a farewell of "Joyeux Noël!"

The snow that had melted atop the child's red woolen hat sparkled. Liu let out a soft chuckle, thinking the child looked like a little fairy.

As the child in the red hat bustled away with friends into the adjacent alley, Yeehyeon appeared shortly after at the main gate of The Hands. It was the first time Liu had seen him that day — his morning walk must have been skipped because of the snow.

Liu leaned forward, tense.

Although he was wearing a slightly thicker coat than usual, Yeehyeon had neither a scarf nor gloves on. Since the deep winter had set in, Yeehyeon hadn't worn a scarf or gloves once.

No matter how much higher the average winter temperature in Paris was than in Seoul, winter was still winter. Parisians made sure to bundle up with cold-weather gear instead of wearing lighter clothes.

Liu's face tightened as he watched Yeehyeon pull the iron handle of The Hands with his bare hands. It felt as if his own hands were freezing.

"Are you doing that just to break my heart?"

He knew it wasn't true, but the words came out of vexation.

Yeehyeon stopped walking and looked up at the sky, opening his palm to gauge the snowflakes landing on it. To Liu, even that looked like a scene from a movie.

"Could you at least use an umbrella?"

Contrary to Liu's hopes, Yeehyeon seemed to decide against going back inside for an umbrella, opting instead to just walk in the snow.

When he had spoken to Yuni earlier, he had tried suggesting that Yeehyeon wear cold-weather items like a scarf or gloves, but to no avail.

Of course, Liu hadn't claimed to have seen Yeehyeon in Paris himself. He had only tried to steer the conversation naturally by asking if Yeehyeon was dressing warmly.

[He says he can't stand it — too stuffy. It didn't work even when someone gave them to him as a gift.]

Those were the words Yuni had relayed.

"Oh? Someone gave him another gift?"

[Yeehyeon is popular. Even if it's not romantic interest, there are many people who care about him as a person.]

That made sense. Why wouldn't it? This was a situation he had anticipated and prepared for. Yet, as he heard the news, a cold sweat broke out on Liu's back.

"Could it be that he received a confession…?"

[I really shouldn't say any more. I feel like… I'm being a spy.]

Yuni hesitated, replying with an awkward tone. Liu nodded in understanding.

"Right, I see. This is enough. Thank you."

He said it calmly, but the thought that someone near Yeehyeon held feelings for him had kept Liu awake for over a week.

"It's over now, we broke up" — neither Liu nor Yeehyeon had used such definitive language to describe their changed relationship. Consequently, the people around them couldn't ask directly.

Choi Inwu and Shushu had a general understanding of the whole situation — that Liu was a Ghost and what he had done to Yeehyeon. However, Manager Han, Baek Yuni, and Kwon Juhan only vaguely suspected that the two were no longer in the relationship they once shared, completely unaware of the reason why.

They were still both caring about each other, still in love, so what on earth had happened?

They were frustrated, but they couldn't pry too much. They understood that romantic relationships were far more complex and sensitive matters when viewed from the outside, and that love was several times more complicated than a relationship itself.

Yeehyeon descended the stairs and began walking toward the canal.

The temperature was low, the wind was cold, and it was even snowing, making the roads poor. Where was he going? Seeing that he was even wearing a backpack, it didn't seem like his destination was nearby. Out of curiosity, Liu slowly drove his car and followed behind him.

Yeehyeon passed the familiar café and the gift shop with the clock rabbit, then crossed the bridge.

Although the road conditions were poor, Yeehyeon's walking speed was a bit slower than usual because he was observing the snowy scenery. However, due to the heavy snowfall, all the cars were barely moving, which thankfully made it not too difficult to follow him slowly by car.

A smile crept onto Liu's face as he watched Yeehyeon's back, hands tucked into the pockets of his coat, glancing around at the scenery. How could a person's very nape look so lovable?

At the same time, he felt uneasy seeing his long neck and the back of his neck exposed above his collar, looking cold. If only he could wrap an arm around him. If only he could warm his reddened earlobes with the heat from his own hands….

A bistro shaded by blue and white striped awnings was visible just beyond the bridge. A bistro with red awnings faced it from across a small alley. Yeehyeon turned into the alley between them.

He's heading to catch Metro Line 7.

By now, roughly anticipating Yeehyeon's movements based on his path was no longer difficult. Liu sped up, racing ahead of him. The plan was to get to the exit Yeehyeon would use first.

As he passed Yeehyeon, Liu caught sight of him in the side mirror.

His face like something meticulously drawn with ink on rice paper.

In the mirror, Yeehyeon quickly receded into the distance.

He imagined immediately wrenching the wheel, stopping the car, and revealing himself in front of him. Yeehyeon, it's Christmas. What would his reaction be if he offered that awkward smile as an excuse?

Liu rested his elbow on the window frame and toyed with his lower lip, letting out a wry smile. It was nothing but useless fantasy.

Joining the main road, Liu made a U-turn toward the exit Yeehyeon was headed for, just as Yeehyeon turned the corner of the alley. Liu's car began to drive slowly toward him.

Squeak, screech.

The wipers repeatedly swept away the snowflakes settling on the windshield. With every sweep, Yeehyeon moved several steps closer.

Yeehyeon descending the stairs toward the Metro exit, and Liu in his sedan. The distance between the two narrowed, then they crossed paths. After that, they moved apart again.

Yeehyeon bumped shoulders with a man climbing up from the station. He offered a brief apology and immediately started back down the stairs. However, Yeehyeon didn't notice the man who couldn't bring himself to leave, constantly looking back at him.

Liu, momentarily stopped at a traffic light with his hazard lights flashing, watched the entire scene in his rearview and side mirrors.

He briefly considered tailing him like a real private investigator or detective. But that was too dangerous. He was probably just heading to his regular art supply store in the Marais district….

Once Yeehyeon left, the stalker had nothing left to do.

Liu, driving around the neighborhood, suddenly felt like having a drink. He returned to his apartment, parked the car, and walked toward the canal.

He decided he would wait somewhere for Yeehyeon to return. He knew exactly the perfect spot for that. He huddled his neck against the increasingly chilly weather and hurried his steps. He worried about Yeehyeon, who had left wearing light clothing.

"Bonjour!"

As he stepped into the shop, a tall waiter recognized Liu, raised one hand, and greeted him warmly.

"Bonjour."

Liu returned the simple greeting.

Although Yeehyeon rarely passed directly in front of this bistro, it was perfectly situated diagonally across from Yeehyeon's regular café and the entrance to The Hands alley. It was the ideal spot to wait for Yeehyeon without worrying about being seen. It inevitably became one of Liu's regular haunts, and over time, he became familiar with the waiters.

Luckily, a window seat was available. Liu took it, shrugging off his coat.

The Christmas tree had already dominated the center of the establishment since mid-November, and carols filled the air inside. Around this time of year, the scenery was much the same wherever you went in the world.

"When was the last time we had snow like this in Paris? Right?"

As he handed over the menu, the waiter struck up a friendly conversation. He was certain Liu lived nearby.

Liu followed the waiter's gaze toward the view outside the window and nodded.

"It is. It's rare."

"You won't be in Paris for Christmas, then?"

"……"

Hearing the certainty in the waiter's tone, he lifted his chin to look up at him.

"You speak a little French but are more comfortable in English. You're not a Parisian. People usually go back home to their families for Christmas."

"Ah… no. I plan to be in Paris this Christmas."

Liu opened the menu and shook his head as he replied.

"Ooh. I guess you have a lover in Paris?"

The waiter said with a teasing expression and voice. Then, he looked down at Liu's face and nodded as if agreeing with himself.

"Right. It's impossible for you not to have a lover."

Liu gave a weak laugh at the waiter's boldness, then suddenly looked out the window again. The street where Yeehyeon always walked had long since become a familiar scene to him as well. He would be here this Christmas. With him. By his side. Even if Yeehyeon didn't know that.

"That's right. I want to be with him, so I plan to stay in Paris, too."

"As expected."

He wanted to feel the sensation of being Yeehyeon's lover, even if it was just by saying it to someone he barely knew.

The waiter, having taken the order and collected the menus, added something as if he had just remembered before leaving.

"Oh, one more thing."

"……"

"Because you always give such a generous tip, I figured you were definitely not a Parisian."

At the waiter's playful wink, Liu couldn't help but let out a small chuckle.

He drank his wine, enjoying a rare, leisurely moment.

The atmosphere was exciting, just a few days before Christmas. Snow was piled up, and it was still snowing.

The warm glow of the lights decorating the tree and the sound of Christmas carols.

Things he used to look at without feeling anything, things that previously held no meaning, now made Liu sentimental. What if he could share all of this with Yeehyeon? Just that one wish was enough.

Paris, with its heavy snow falling, was beautiful. This was true even though it wasn't a view featuring the Eiffel Tower, the Champs-Élysées, or the Seine River. In fact, this small corner of the alley at the very edge of the 19th arrondissement was more beautiful right now than any of Paris's glamorous spots. Because this was where Yeehyeon would return.

What he told the waiter wasn't a lie. Liu really did plan to stay here until after Christmas.

Manager Han had given him about a week off while Phantom underwent major interior renovations.

"Get some rest. Do what you want to do…. Go wherever you want to go. Just don't spend twenty-five hours round trip on a plane every weekend."

She knew. She knew that Liu had been flying back and forth to Paris every weekend.

Kwon Juhan had even made a bolder statement.

"Go and take him back."

He had said that with a challenging look — go and steal Yeehyeon back. Because Kwon Juhan was someone who dreamed a Peter Pan-like dream, wanting Phantom to remain whole more than anyone else. The changed relationship between Liu and Yeehyeon might have been a wound for Juhan comparable to his parents' divorce.

Take him back….

Pouring more red wine into his empty glass, Liu gave a pained, deflated laugh.

If someone had stolen him, he would have tried by any means necessary to take him back. But he hadn't lost Yeehyeon to theft. He had lost him on his own. There was no one to blame, and he didn't know who to challenge.

He could only wait for Yeehyeon's forgiveness.

Michael Bublé's "The Christmas Song" ended, and a new song began — "Santa Claus Is Coming To Town," sung by Frank Sinatra.

Come to think of it, a year had passed since he started waiting for Yeehyeon.

Liu grimaced without realizing it at the memory of last Christmas.

Last Christmas had been a horrific memory — cleaning up the mess he had created in New York, where everything he had prepared for Yeehyeon remained untouched.

Everything he had prepared for Yeehyeon?

No, it was a trap designed to stop him from leaving.

What about this Christmas?

If the past year of waiting had been fruitful enough, perhaps the white-bearded old man in his reindeer-drawn sleigh would grant him a small reward too.

Liu covered his face with one hand and chuckled from within it. He even shook his head in disbelief.

That was truly an uncharacteristic thought.

Just as he was finishing his third glass of wine, Yeehyeon appeared on the bridge.

Liu remained seated, watching Yeehyeon. He silently followed his movements with his eyes while savoring and swallowing the wine, as if watching a film.

In the late afternoon landscape as twilight deepened, Yeehyeon, carrying a backpack, hurried along. Even so, he didn't forget to pause briefly in front of Mr. Rabbit, as if greeting the doll.

Seo Yeehyeon, who couldn't just pass by Mr. Rabbit.

For Liu, that alone was as good as a small gift from Santa Claus. It was enough.

Around the time the sun had fully set and the heavy snow that had poured down all day eased into a lull, Liu left the shop. Heat radiated from his body after drinking wine, making the air touching his cheeks feel refreshingly cool.

After crossing the bridge, he inevitably paused briefly in front of the gift shop.

Mr. Rabbit, Alice, and the charming tea set.

Inside the display window, enhanced with Christmas decorations, they seemed to emit a more mystical light than usual. It felt as if something fantastic was about to unfold right before his eyes.

Since when have I become someone so influenced by the Christmas atmosphere? Liu chuckled, shoved his hands into his coat pockets, and turned to leave. Yet he didn't dislike the feeling.

Christmas carols were also playing in Yeehyeon's regular café. Everyone inside the brightly lit café — eating, drinking, laughing, and chatting — looked happy. He wasn't jealous of their happiness.

He was happier now, loving and waiting for Yeehyeon, than the past version of himself who hadn't known or loved the person named Seo Yeehyeon.

As he casually glanced over his shoulder just after turning the corner, he noticed Ben from The Hands following behind him. Strictly speaking, Ben wasn't following him; they were simply headed to the same destination.

While pretending to browse the store displays, Ben passed Liu.

Tap, tap. Ben shook the snow off his feet after stamping them on the steps and disappeared inside the main entrance of The Hands. In that moment, Ben was the man Liu envied most in the world. He lived in the same building as Yeehyeon and could visit him whenever he wanted.

At the corner of the alley, Liu stared up at the windows of The Hands for a long time from in front of the closed optician's shop. Seeing that most of the rooms were dark, it seemed they were all gathered together in the second-floor living room.

He had thought he wanted Yeehyeon to be in pain from longing for him rather than forget him and have a good time. But now, he was relieved that there were people with Yeehyeon.

He was relieved that it was Liu himself looking up at the light spilling from the window on this snow-covered alley corner, and not Yeehyeon. Truly.

He pictured Yeehyeon spending a boisterous, warm year-end surrounded by people. With a faint smile, Liu turned away. Should he find some stark bar, one lacking any soft Christmas cheer, and have another drink? With that thought, he walked slowly toward the apartment.

He stopped on the street to slow his pace and took out his cigarette pack. He cupped his left hand around the tip of the cigarette to shield it from the wind and struck a match.

Crackling. The sound of footsteps running down the snow-covered alley suddenly captured Liu's attention.

Like foreshadowing in a movie, those footsteps inexplicably made his heart race.

The footsteps, which had been growing nearer, stopped abruptly nearby. Liu turned his head toward the corner of the alley he had just turned away from.

……

He froze, like someone who had just encountered an angel in a dead-end street.

His left hand moved of its own accord, pulling the cigarette from his lips.

White breath plumed from Yeehyeon's lips as he gasped for air. He couldn't believe it.

Should he run? Did he have to run?

He hadn't prepared any excuse to offer Yeehyeon for why he was here.

"For an undercover operation… isn't your appearance a little too conspicuous?"

It wasn't the expression one would give when looking at a hideous monster, or a chilling ghost.

Yeehyeon smiled brightly, just as he had in his imagination.

As if the painful process of confronting the truth and digging into each other had never happened.

As if they were lovers who had met by chance after eagerly waiting for one another.

This was a miracle.

Was it truly permissible for him to approach Yeehyeon and speak to him?

Liu, who had been standing rooted to the spot looking at Yeehyeon with the heart of a sinner, suddenly began to move without hesitation. He abandoned the unlit cigarette and strode — almost ran — toward Yeehyeon. His feet moved before his mind could reach a conclusion.

Because Yeehyeon was crying.

He cupped Yeehyeon's cheek, using his thumb to wipe away the tears. This was the cheek he had longed so intensely to touch.

He met the gaze of Yeehyeon, who was looking up at him, his eyes full of moisture.

Wet eyelashes trembled slightly, and Yeehyeon's hand firmly gripped Liu's arm that was holding his cheek.

"Don't go…."

Yeehyeon's every word was an absolute command to Liu. He rested his forehead against Yeehyeon's and nodded.

"I won't go anywhere until you tell me to."

He would rush over the moment Yeehyeon said he wanted to see him, as if on a sudden whim.

And if Yeehyeon then said he never wanted to see him again, he would disappear immediately.

This was the body he had already promised to Yeehyeon. He was even prepared to repeat that for the rest of his life.

Scarcely believing this miracle, he slowly pulled Yeehyeon into an embrace. Yeehyeon's temple touched his right cheek. He felt Yeehyeon's breath on his neck. His chest was filled with Yeehyeon's warmth.

Haa….

His eyes closed on their own, and a sigh of relief escaped from the depths of his being.

This was not a sumbisori.

He had received permission to come fully up to the surface.

He held Yeehyeon, who was telling him not to go, tightly in his arms. Both of Yeehyeon's hands gripped him firmly. He squeezed Yeehyeon's shoulders — bare even of a coat — tighter still, as if trying to hide him from the eyes of the whole world.

Now he was saved. He felt like he could live.